Maybe I could rest beneath your smile

There's a song from my childhood...You don't have to watch the video but you DO have to listen to the song...that's an order.

Woo! I'm excited! Daylan's coming to toooown! And it's Mardi Gras...Moscow version...bwahahah. Poor Yanks, NOTHING compares to a New Orleans Mardi Gras, a bunch of drunk college students being promiscuous is just ridiculous when it's almost a month late...If we did it on the REAL Fat Tuesday at least we'd be in sink with the rest of the country..gosh.

So, this spring break's definitely gonna be different than last years, mainly cuz I wont be texting certain pride and joys of certain famous families. I betcha I will work every day and then find myself in the ONE place I wont allow myself to go...Friends I've notified, make sure you call me at 10pm on the 15th..I think. yeah, fifteenth...I don't want to cause myself any heart brake, but I'm a reminiscer sooo yeah, this could get ridiculous.

In my shallow life, I found Billabong jeans tomorrow..I MUST HAVE THEM. and I will, they're on hold right now..bwahahahah.

I want a callaway..Corvette on speed.

I just watched Gone in 60 Seconds...movie's cheesey as hell but the cars make up for the stupidity of it. There was no real plot, just fast cars beating up beamers and the lame cars of the world...Go Mustangs.

So, today I started writing a novel. I have three chapters done so far and I call it "Silent Screaming". I don't quite know why but I think it will start making sense soon. My main characters name is Pheonix, his dogs name is Simon (SHUDDUP, I LIKE THE NAME, LEAVE ME ALOOOONE, ANNA) and his love interests name is Tess. I'll start posting parts of it when I have it all written down on my computer.

So, despite my current late night obsession with fast cars and writing at work to keep my mind sharp I have currently just recovered from the worst date EVER. Those that know the story can tell those that don't but I'm tired of telling it and each time I tell it I get angrier...Let's just say pretention and thinking you look cool peeling out in a 95 oldsmobile is the worst combination any human could try to sum up...Ugh.

I don't know how much longer I'll survive at this job. Yesterday I literally pulled on my own ear to get myself out of bed. Standing and staring; hallelujah! I've started a tradition where on the last ten minutes of my shift I run around and just do really goofy stuff to everyone which has included-tieing my shirt up like in the 80s, bringing my co-workers dog beds, knocking shoes off of their display(that was once) aaaaaaand yeah...this is my life, envy me.

3 months and one God forsaken day later...

First off, a shout out to my beautiful best friend Paul for bringing me the best chocolate ever at the lamest job ever, Brent for thinkin' of me even though he's got his own girl, and Meg, for bringing me kisses. You guys made my afternoon and I'm keeping all of the packaging.

The Banquet was a good time, lots of good conversation and some awesome valentines/ cards sent my way...it was so fun in fact that it almost made me forget why I hate this God-forsaken singles awareness day until...

I went to country swing..Let's just say, my singleness was made more aware to me more than it ever has been and in the harshest way I could possibly think of....Yes, I saw HIM there and YES, He was with someone that wasn't me which is funny considering how he said he'd make me LIKE valentines day...
In other news; One guy dipped me over his knee held me there for about 5 seconds and told me he wanted me, another asked if all people in Moscow were inbred, and one told me Moscow was a hell hole. FIRST off, knee dude, Tim I think it was, you are sick and a bad dancer and smell like dirty clothes, inbred dude, I'm taller than you and you're going bald, hell hole man, lay off my town, get some anti perspirant for your hands and THEN maybe you can start voicing your opinions on my town.

Last but not least I do not trust liars. Ever. To say one wishy washy thing and then go back on what you said is weak, contradicting, and cowardly...It's one of the things that lessens my opinion of people. Don't be hypocritical, don't beat around the bush cuz you will be found out and someone getting hurt is inevitable. Say it flat out the first time; black and white's much clearer than muddled water colours.

Thank goodness Valentines day's OVER. My heart hurts, my emotions are shot, my depressions in full swing and I am going to sleep for as long as I possibly can.

songs i can relate to right now

"Every time i hear your name" -keith anderson
"Tim Mcgraw"-Taylor swift
"Smile"-Lonestar
"Just to see you smile"-Tim Mcgraw...


These are my favorite recovery songs...how come guys write all the good songs? There's only one girl in there, it's messed up.

I'm STILL not over it...gugsadfjdhs! I danced to a song that I and _____ claimed as "ours" tonight with someone else...with Danny. It was fun of course, but hurt. As "It just comes natural"(shuddup, Anna I KNOW YOU'RE THINKIN' OF THE JACK N THE BOX DRIVETHROUGH I don't APPRECIATE IT) He noticed I wasn't singin' and asked if I was ok and I told him we were dancing to my and that travisty's old song and Danny held me a little tighter. geeeeez.

Anyways I donno what else to say just needed to type...how long can this keep goin' on?

NO MORE LOSERRRRRRRRRRS!

I got asked out again today...that's 5...ugh..on a lighter note, HAPPY MARDI GRAS!

STUPID GIANTS

To those that haven't heard the story:

Today I got asked out my fourth time at Tri-State but this time above all others took the cake. The guy came in to give a co-worker of mine some money but he said to leave it with the cute girl(me) so the guy was like, "I guess YOU'RE the cutie, huh?"
blah blah blah and then he leaves..fine...but THEN, he comes back, puts two candy bars on the counter and says,"I just gotta find a way to talk to you more." and I was like "I doubt that." so then this guy says, "Why don't you give me your numberrrrrrrr so I can prove it to you." "OK." I say, so I give him a number...A number, not mine, A number. ...I gave him Paul's number so now when he calls it, he will be faced with a blue eyed skinny trombonist with a man's voice as opposed to a brown haired blue eyed hula girl...Call me horrible, but to ask out a girl over power bars and bad winking technique is kinda horrible as well and calls for some humiliating number giving. I wouldn't do this to every guy, but the way he went about it was just so sleazy and greasy that I couldn't resist.

My co-worker Brandon, who is gorgeous asked me if I'd ever do that to a guy like him and I said no, but before I said no he claimed I've scared him off talkin' to girls for a good few days...so win/loss situation but OOOOOOOOh good heavens it was fun...Men, remember this next time you try to hit on a girl you've never seen in your life. Instead of power bars go to the lingerie store and try your luck there.

Holy Moses

K SO THIS WEEK AT TRI-STATE:

At work, they have two nicknames for me: "wax onwax off" cuz I like cars, and "Newby"...

I got asked out 3 times yesterday....ridiculous; the most memorable attempt that was preceded by multiple "accidental" hand grabs on his part was as follows;


"guy:So you wanna go to lunch?"
" me: I just got done with lunch."
" guy: well, Iiiiii think you should take another one, your friend'll cover for ya."
"co-worker: no, I wont."
" guy:*searches my eyes* so...you don't want to go to lunch with me?"
" me: um, no, thanks for asking though."
" guy-oh....ok (hurt puppy look)"....

It wasn't as flattering as it sounds

One guy came into Tri state and he had a cross tattooed on his left ring finger so being the curious, talkative cashier I am I asked him if it represented anything...He then told me about how he proposed to a girl and five days later she got killed, so he got that tattoo....I felt awful for asking and all I could muster saying was, "that's a sweet story though, least you have faith though right?" The guy kinda smiled, and said, "yeah...You're the first person to ever ask why I have this." It was then I didn't know what to say so I handed him his receipt, gave a sympathetic/sorry smile, and let him go on his way...what a guy, what a life. I felt kinda stupid saying it was a sweet story, but at the same time it's better than just saying "oh, bummer."

Today, as I rung people up I made a comment on a Washington license that I liked how they have a little heart to show they're a donor. The next guy in line gave me his ID and he must have known I was lookin' for the heart cuz he said, "I don't have a heart on mine, I'm a receiver." and I looked up at him and he had the kindest face ever, but I could tell he was tired. His wife rubbed his back sweetly as he told me that. "Awesome, what a lucky guy." I said, he smiled they went on their way and I was suddenly very appreciative of my organs.

And now work is done 'til Monday, I've survived my second week, and get to sleep in tomorrow! Hallelujah! I plan on snowboarding down some local hills, sample some local cuisine, and watch some unlocal football in which the Patriots will kick all ass and I will be in a permanently good mood until Feb. 14th....black Thursday.